Last updated: September 13, 2017

What To Do When You’re Too Comfortable In Your Relationship



If anything will ruin a high value man’s relationship that he is otherwise perfectly happy with, this is it. It is simply women’s nature that causes them to lure you into a state of comfort. They make you food, fold your clothes, fuck you like monkeys, and just make you happy. Nothing wrong with that. But my goodness, does it make you just stagnate. I just can’t help but wonder if this is a designed biological function to help females keep a mate. If you have everything you could need in the confines of your relationship, and rarely need to leave the house while she is around, then you’ll simply never have a chance to game other girls.

Not that there’s a problem with a lazy day once in a while, but you should be moving forward. All the time, less you end up like every other person. When you have a girlfriend that you’re quite happy with, the desire to do absolutely nothing is very, very high. This is how men are then lured into marriage, a family, and more. They get comfortable in their relationship, start to let themselves go a bit, and the deeper commitment route just seems easier and easier with each passing day.

Now that I’ve been in a relationship for a while, there’s really no doubt in mind that it’s a biological function of a woman to provide you so much comfort that you simply don’t want to do anything else. Let’s break this down a bit.

When you get too comfortable, you don’t want to build.

You know that feeling after you’ve had an orgasm? Personally, all I want to do is have a glass of water and then pass out wherever I am. All of my energy, drive, and momentum gets zapped up – all in exchange for the pleasure of an orgasm that only lasts a few seconds at best. Fleeting pleasure. Stop jerking it, seriously.

Of course, your measure as a man is directly measured by what you do build. For simplicity sake, we will say that your measure as a man is defined by your attractiveness to the opposite sex, and the respect given to you by other high value males. When a man builds – whether it be a business, his financial empire, a notch post fit for a prince, or any other number of accomplishments – he is directly impacting his value to both sexes. The more power and money you have, the more attractive you are to women, and the more men respect you. And of course, the man who rules the men consequently rules the women.

A woman who has a high value man will be attracted to him for what he has built. Deep down, she knows that the more he builds, accomplishes, and possesses, the more that other women will be attracted to him. What she does not understand is the loyalty instinct that men often have, simply because women often…lack it.

The bubble.

In most cases, a woman takes the backwards route to keeping a man around (by male logic). Rather than supporting him in building new endeavors and adventures, they instead create a bubble around the man. This is easily seen in any suburb of the United States, and is also plastered all over every major sitcom to hit the airwaves. What women do, in most cases, is attempt to take the man off the market by undermining his credibility and attempting to shatter the very things that made her attracted to him in the first place. What they don’t realize is that if they were simply supportive and pushed him to be his best, they would often be rewarded with outstanding loyalty – to an extent, fame and exuberant amounts of money come into play as well.

Nearly every male-female relationship I witnessed growing up involved a woman who made the majority of the household decisions and seemed to hold the power of the relationship. My own parents, all my aunts/uncles, and all my friends. The husband was always the goon of the house, at the mercy of a tongue-lashing from the wife at any point. Any dreams that the man had prior to marriage and family were in the woman’s purse, along with his balls.*

* Note: this is an extreme case, fortunately my own parents were not this bad.

This also goes towards explaining the high divorce rates running rampant through the world. As a self-defense mechanism to protect themselves and ensure their man’s loyalty, women self-destruct their own attraction to their husbands and significant others simply because they create such a comfortable bubble for the man to live in. Once he’s trapped in the bubble, the hell of doing housework and changing poopy diapers manifests itself like a disease. There’s no way to escape unless you shatter the bubble or are strong enough to resist it in the first place. Which leads me to…myself.

My relationship is very comfortable.

I’ve been with my girlfriend for nearly a year now, and I’d be lying through my damn teeth if I said I wasn’t comfortable as hell with her. It has absolutely impacted my work ethic. When we were living in the same neighborhood, less than a mile apart, it was simply too easy to walk over to her house and hang out for the evening. I’d get a hot meal, sex, and then spend some time lounging around and cuddling. It took me moving to a brand new city to realize this. All of a sudden, when I wasn’t hanging out with her all the time, the blog started taking off again, and I’m back on track.

But even when I see her every weekend, the work ethic slips. She puts this bubble around me that makes me incredibly happy, yet incredibly lazy at the same time. I’m learning how to fight through it. I get up before her, get a workout in, and try to get some work done throughout the weekend. It’s simply too easy to lay in bed until 11:00 am with a beautiful girl. It takes an enormous amount of self motivation to leave the bubble and continue fighting through to continue building. It is absolutely aggravating to know that someone who makes you very happy also has the power to very easily hold you back.

Closing comments: It is becoming much easier for me to move past this, with the understanding and acceptance that it simply is what it is. Just like a man comes to terms that nice guys finish last, this is just another roadblock. Accepting that the one who claims to love you more than anything is “accidentally” trying to kill the very thing she loves about you.

Part of understanding game is just learning to accept this part of women and swat it away like the annoying fly it is.

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Leave a Reply

  1. I’m currently in this situation with TWO different girls. You’re right, you just want to lay in bed and chill and be unproductive. Especially when they ask you to stay for “just a little longer” or “5 more minutes”.

    It is tough! We just gotta keep building. Good post.

  2. Man, I’ve been there. Waking up early helps me with that like you said, but on the weekends I usually just set aside a block of time for things I want to take care of. It works out cause then she gets to do some things she wants to do that I might not want to join in anyway.

  3. The easiest way i found around it was to slightly involve her. Fake authority. ‘I’m doing weights, wanna watch? i’ll coach you on squats after’ ‘i just threw 4k into shares, got 1k left, shall we throw that in too, or buy gld?’ ‘we’re getting a new car, second hand only, here is my list, lets go’ ‘I’m reading this book, you should quiz me on it at the end to make sure i got it all’ Keep her on her toes, running around, doing all sorts of things to ‘help’ you. She won’t even notice you’re doing whatever you want to regardless. she’ll just be happy to feel involved.

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