Last updated: December 19, 2016

Why Women Are Okay Being In A Harem



[This post originally appeared on Masculine Development. Make sure to check out Jon’s site, it’s excellent.]

My friend Jon has a great article here on this very site about why women don’t care about looks. In that post, he dives into why women are attracted to characteristics as opposed to physical traits in a man.

I’m here to debunk another myth using similar reasoning—that women aren’t okay with you dating…well, other women.

Since I began my game journey many years ago, I’ve done it all. I’ve traveled around the world and “captured some flags”. I’ve had my share of one night stands. I’ve fallen in and love and out again. But the one thing that truly made me a more confident, successful, masculine man was running harems.

And really, a harem is the pinnacle of game. Every guy wants it. Every guy who chastises a man who does date multiple women is usually just jealous.

But what stops a lot of guys is this: the myth out there that women aren’t okay with you dating other girls. This simply couldn’t be farther from the truth. In Jon’s original post, there is a lot of discussion about primal values; i.e. what is biologically hardwired into us.

The fact of the matter is, women will not explicitly tell you it’s okay to date other girls. It is the underlying assumption that they’re okay with it that makes their panties damp.

Let’s debunk why this myth that women aren’t okay with it is around, and then move on to how to actually build a harem.


Again, most men are programmed to think that all women want their man 100% to themselves. This is perfectly construed to a typical modern-day age of thinking. Men are also told to bring flowers and worship a girl, and we all know that’s a worthless tactic if you actually want to get laid.

If we look back at the olden days, it’s simple. There was a point in time where humanity didn’t know if it was going to survive.

Men had the goals of impregnating as many women as possible in order to pass their genes on and ensure the survival of their bloodline.

This was a time of life when women were always pregnant. There were no birth control pills or condoms. Pulling out wasn’t a thing, either. It was common for a woman to become pregnant again while she was still breast-feeding the previous rugrat. This was a necessary thing (along with men providing and protecting and women nurturing at home) for the survival of our species.

All of the new elements to our society have come about in very recent years. You simply cannot undo thousands of years of biological programming in a few decades. All of those primal urges are still very much alive within both men and women.


Too much male logic is often applied to analyzing female actions. The fact is that female actions are rarely logic in nature. They are based off of how a woman feels in that very moment.

A man looks at his girlfriend and is disgusted by the idea of her having sex with another guy. That man is violating his territory and there is nothing sexy about it. Sure, there are some cucks that get off on the idea of their girl being banged by another dude, but those are the insecure and weak men of society.

You cannot apply that same logic to the way that women will view a man having sex with a woman that isn’t them. Most of them are actively turned on by the thought because it proves he is a high-value man. Other women are desiring him. If other women want him, then his seed must be strong. Therefore, her offspring also have a good chance of being strong and surviving.

Are girls actively having these thoughts in their head? No, absolutely not! It’s all subconscious thoughts. But the result of that biology means that she gets turned on by him having sex with other girls. That subconscious thought process leads to wet panties and hot sex.


Now, with this newfound knowledge, we know that women will be okay with being in a harem. The only thing we’re missing is the new age thinking that actually amplifies this.

What do I mean?

In 2016, girls are taught that it’s good to be slutty and discover themselves. They’re encouraged not to settle down, or hell—to even get tied down momentarily in a long-term relationship. These days, girls are actively against any serious relationship that will kill all of the dreams they’re told they’re supposed to have.

Now we have the core, primal biology AND new-age social thinking. This results in a crazy concoction where you can get away with just about anything with girls.

Just about all girls are absolutely okay with being a part of your harem. They want to have hot sex and enjoy some benefits of dating, but they don’t want the exclusive relationship. This makes it incredibly easy to build a harem, as long as you’re a cool and confident guy who fucks them well and doesn’t get clingy.


Despite the modern way of thinking, social shame still stands head and shoulders above everything else that influences women.

You do not want to rub it in her face that you’re dating other girls and she is just one of many.

Do everything in your power to signal that you are running a harem but do not actually utter the words. If you do this, she loses her ability to come up with excuses for herself.

There is a big difference in thinking:

“I like this guy. He’s cool, not clingy, and let’s me have my girl power independence. Not a bad lay, either. He’s got hairs in his bed that aren’t mine…I wonder if they’re from a long time ago or if it’s recent? I mean, I guess we aren’t exclusive so it doesn’t matter…but I bet I’m hotter. He probably doesn’t have another girl.”

That girl is going to bang his brains out. Versus, if you say: “Hey, you’re actually in my harem and one of 4 girls I’m sleeping with”…

“Oh my God, I can’t believe he’s sleeping with other women. I mean, I guess it’s okay cause we aren’t exclusive BUT WHAT IF MY FRIENDS FIND OUT!!! They’ll think I’m such a slut, ugh. What if they know one of the other girls? I can’t handle this anymore. I have to break it off with him….such a shame because he’s cool, not clingy, let’s me have my girl power independence…”

See what happened there?

That explicit tell that you’re having other dalliances put her in a situation where she had no escape. At that point, you’re likely going to lose her or she’s going to demand a commitment. That means giving up your harem.
Which is caving her to frame, which makes her lose respect for you, and…well, we know where this is going, don’t we?


It’s time to stop being limited by what society tells you is accepted and what’s not.

Dating multiple women and having them be okay with that is something that can never be openly discussed in society.

However, if you are willing to look deeper you’ll see the reasons why. You can live a more free life, with all of the sex and companionship you desire. Breaking free is the way to be.

King’s Code teaches you how to do all of this. Click here to get your copy.

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Leave a Reply

  1. I think that you are talking about American women. Foreign women, especially the main ones in Ukraine, Colombia, the Philippines, etc. are looking for serious relationship/marriage with American or Western men.

    If women want to have sex with you on the first date or meeting, do not expect any of them to be interested in you romantically and seriously…except maybe a few of them.

  2. No sometimes there are dudes who are that kinky and secure enough in their relationship or ok if it ends with the cunt going off with someone else and out of his hair.

  3. Sorry but women aren’t fine with men sleeping with multiple women it’s a huge turn off not a turn on… And women who are part of a harem have psychological problems, those are the only ones who allow this kind of treatment by a man. Real men commit, damaged men have harems and notch women up on bed posts. If you have a harem harem members will leave until you are alone with nothing

  4. Listen, I don’t know what woman told you guys these lies but in American society today, there are likely more women to beat the crap out of a man for CHEATING (yes, there is a word for it) on her. None of the men reading this and actually believing it must be good with women because if you were, then you’d know that this.. “article” is absolutely ridiculous. Many women today are only a part of a man’s “harem” when they have no other chance of a steady life. SOME may do it for fun, but you are wrong saying that this applies to American women. I am a WOMAN, and I KNOW that your words are full of crap. If the woman (or women) in your life feels this way, then give yourself a pat on the back for surrounding yourself with women that obviously don’t care about or love you enough to actually be jealous (the universal sign that someone really cares about you) when you fool around with other women. Do you want three cheers??

  5. this is genuinely the cringiest thing I’ve ever read, thank you for somehow making me feel like more of a man than you even if I’ll never “have a harem”

  6. I don’t usually reply to posts but this one just made me do it.

    What you’re saying here is cheating. You’re just hoping she won’t find out and it’s not about her friends finding out, it’s also that she will feel hurt. *Most times girls agree to this non exclusive thing if they’re hoping it will lead to something more*. That is if you’re really serious.

    – If you get serious with one of them you would very quickly find excuses for others. Basically, you’re hurting one or the other (or both (or all)) at the end.

    The girls that agree to it ‘for fun’ also end up wanting something more at the end, obviously if you’re good in everything she has no reason to think otherwise.

    If you fuck another girl and your current girl agrees to it, this just means you’re making her feel “she’s not enough”, that you need others to fill the gap. And yeah she might then agree but inside she won’t ever be okay with it. If girls in your harem aren’t happy, you suck.

    I get your primal instinct thing and that’s good at the beginning she might get attracted if she sees other girls attracted to you but once she’s close enough to you, this works against you. She might get distant if she doesn’t notice any change in how you treat other girls.

    Also FYI, a harem isn’t what you’re saying here. Each of your girls should know they are in a harem and should be okay with it. THAT is a harem. Yours is just a non disclosed secret. You don’t create harem by trickery.

    And while creating a harem is possible, I don’t see it as a long term thing.
    Every girl in your harem is also your responsibility. If you think that, then you’re the man who can actually run a harem.

    But how long, what if you make multiple girls pregnant.
    – Do you have enough resources to take care of them all, even if the girl says she’s self dependent, she would need help.
    – If you have resources, do you have enough time to raise kids properly. What would you reply if they ask about your other girls. Once they grow up, you won’t be as much of a ‘pinnacle of a man’.
    Eat as much as you can chew.

    It’s a shit idea long term. It’s not ‘pinnacle of the game’. And u don’t need a harem for fucking multiple girls short term.

    The fact that u want to fuck multiple girls just shows you’re not ready for a long term commitment. There are girls who share the same, they would be open to explore new things without getting serious. And this doesn’t make you ‘the man’.

    – If the girl doesn’t exclusively say she’s open to such things don’t continue this stuff, and if you can’t control and choose to justify your actions by saying “she likes it but is just scared that her friends will find out”, this isn’t a manly thing either.

    Don’t let your dick be your brain.

    These are not just stupid lines i have direct experience. Nothing in this is manly.

  7. Well I bet you have more experience with women. While I do agree about the top value man in this article. We talk about the less than 1% of men. Powerfull men that arent seen by the average joe. They can do whatever they want. Yes for you it maybe cringe cause it seems like this thing wont happen to you. I personaly could care less. But I am just an online dick who likes to mess with people who think they know shit. Well as long as you are happy and full. And seems like you are some young todler via your cringe usage. Big man indeed.

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