I’ve done this previously to great amusement, but this time is a little more specific. I’ve picked out the very best OKCupid search terms that readers have used to discover my blog. In this mailbag, I’ll try to answer their questions the best I can.

My new book, Cracking OKCupid, covers much of this in much more detail.
“approaching women on okcupid”
Let’s be honest here – it’s really hard to classify typing and sending a message on the internet as an “approach”. In real life, when you physically walk your feet over to a woman and put your ego on the line – it’s much harder than pounding away at the keyboard.
With that technicality out of the way, there’s no need to overthink the situation. You should be copy/pasting the same few messages to all women and hoping one of them bite. To do otherwise is a grossly inefficient use of time.
“no messages on okcupid”
*If you are a man*: get used to it.
*If you are a woman*: you’re ugly. Lose some weight, fatty.
“why girls do not message first on okcupid”
Because they already have a full time job in reading, screening, and then responding to all of the messages they get from thirsty dudes. The only exception to this rule is if a woman is ugly, as I already mentioned. If she’s desperate enough she might resort to actually putting herself out there and messaging men – but it’s still not likely. Girls don’t have the guts to stomach putting their ego on the line and facing rejection.
It’s funny though, because even fatties have a fantastic hamster wheel to run themselves around on to somehow justify the reason why when it’s rejected. They’ll usually tell themselves it’s because a guy is shallow, but they just refuse to accept the biology of how attraction works.
“okcupid conguer 2015”
I’m going to assume this is supposed to be “cougar”, though part of me also thought it might be “conquer”.
Regardless, first word of advice: learn to spell before writing your profile. Your profile is a representation of who you are, so if you want a high-value girl, you need to put your best foot forward. Cutting out the silly grammar errors is a necessity. While I hesitate to compare an OKCupid message to a job resume, it’s worth the consideration.
Would you ever hire anyone who had blatant typos on their resume? No, you’d send it straight to the trash in most cases. Same applies – if your profile shows blatant lack of grammar – to the trash with you. Chance gone.
On to the cougar question.
First off, date young girls, because they’re hotter.
But if you really want the cougars, it’s doubtful you’ll find them on OKCupid. You’re better off joining a site dedicated to cougars or scouring Craigslist or your local MILF bars. The best advice I can give is to make sure your profile is mature (with maturity comes impeccable grammar!), and that you exaggerate your age as much as you can. I go into a whole chapter about lying in my book.
“questions to ask girls on okcupid”
I always like to ask girls if they’re “trouble”.
“bald and okcupid”
Bald is badass. Much better to be bald than one of the clueless guys with wings of hair on both sides of their hair, still in deniable about losing it.
Pictures are a key part of any dating platform or app, OKCupid being no exception. Get the best photos you can, and test. Doesn’t matter if you’re bald or you have flowing dreadlocks.
“okcupid flakes”
This post on flakes will make you feel better, to start.
Flaking is just part of the game – OKCupid, daygame, nightgame – just about anything except for hooker game (there’s a high cost of entry on this one). Get used to it and roll with the punches. Start scheduling multiple girls at the same time, and then you flake on them. It feels good. Am I dark triad?
“okcupid age filter broken”
As long as it’s not dipping down to allow 15 year olds on the site, it’s all fair game!
As a sidenote, be careful, men. Sometimes 16/17 year old girls will go on OKCupid to meet guys. Remember that girls are often turned on by “older” men, even if it’s just a few years. She certainly doesn’t have access to twenty year old men at her high school, so she’ll lie about this on a dating site or app. If they let this slip (often times it’s very obvious), report her.
I really mean that, take the time to report her for age violation. Do it so a fellow man doesn’t end up in jail for fucking jailbait.
“no one answers me on okcupid”
Buy my book.
But seriously – it’s probably worth it. If not, I’ll refund your money.
“what is the average time it takes to find a girlfriend on okcupid?”
You should never use online dating with the intention of finding a girlfriend. The reason being: most of them are sluts, going on a dozen or more dates a month, and being used like a cum dumpster. Most girls on OKCupid are not girlfriend-worthy material. Sure, there’s the diamond in the rough, but if your sole intention is to find a serious QUALITY girlfriend, there are other options available.
Secondly, online dating shouldn’t be your sole platform of getting girls, period. Approach in person and keep those skills sharp, playa.
“okcupid the little box in the bottom right corner that appears”
Yeah…you’ve got mail!