It seems that a lot of people these days go on a lot of first dates. I did it, and had plenty to share about them if you browse through my archives. Gone are the days when you would just be “talking” to someone, then you would “hang out” and then eventually you would move on to a phase where you were dating and together. But now, unless you have specifically had a talk on monogamy, you can bet that sweet girl that you’re dating is still probably going on first dates.
Why wouldn’t she?
With all of the options such as Tinder, OKCupid, Plenty of Fish, and of course daygame and nightgame, an attractive girl has no shortage of suitors. However, just because you get your foot in the door and go on a first date doesn’t mean you should go on a second. It is easy to get in this situation. You meet a girl, go on a first date, but you just don’t really click. Sometimes, it’s awful tempting to try to tough out a second date just in the hopes of getting a fresh notch. We all have dry spells, but learning to simply delete these numbers and start anew is a key part of a player’s growth.
No girl who is not quality is worth any more of your time.
With that being said, I’m here to tell you that you should not go on a second date with that girl, no matter how easy you think she is going to be. Of course, this theory has plenty of grey areas, but went in doubt, you should always…
Trust your gut – always. If your gut feeling is telling you that you should not go out on another date with this girl, then don’t. You will try to “logic” yourself into asking her out again, but 9 times out of 10 it is best to go with your gut. This applies to almost anything in life, not just second dates.
In this instance though, your gut feeling could be a variety of things. Maybe she’s not as good as you remember the night you’d picked her up, when you were already five shots deep. Perhaps she seems a little off, like she might have a bit of crazy in her. Or, maybe she’s perfectly cute and doesn’t seem crazy, but you just don’t seem to click with her in that way. Sometimes that happens. She’s cute and seems fine on paper, but you just aren’t feeling it. This is called chemistry, as corny as it sounds. However, a truer version of chemistry is that you just don’t feel raw, primal attraction – not the bullshit “chemistry” that Cosmopolitan tells every girl when a guy she likes doesn’t call her.
Of course, when she seems fine on paper you want to just set up a second date anyway. “Maybe we’ll click better the second time around,” is an easy way to hamster yourself towards setting up a plan. And sure, maybe you guys will click more and jump into the sack, and you’ll have wasted tons of time just to get a nut. I did this so many times in the hopes of this happening, and while it did once in a while – most of the time I ended up so bored on the second date I was looking for an escape route rather than trying to move the seduction forward.
When I was new to game, I just wanted one thing – notches. I was unable to grasp the concept of opportunity costs in terms of game, and I reckon that plenty of aspiring playboys out there are in that same boat. If you never took an economics class, opportunity cost is what you give up in order to pursue something (note: this is the “player’s definition”).
So if you go out on a second date with that girl who you’re truthfully just “meh” about – you are thereby giving up the opportunity of taking out a new girl. If not taking a new girl out, then you are losing a night of opportunity to hit the club and meet someone new, for example.
Opportunity cost should always be considered when you are on the fence about a girl. Most times, you are better off without her. There are plenty more girls out there, and most vaginas generally feel the same. Don’t waste any more time with “meh” girls – don’t go on that second date.
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