Last updated: January 9, 2020

German Girls: Your Ultimate Dating Guide

Dating Abroad, Europe, Germany, Western Europe


Say Auf Wiedersehen to German girls stereotypes. We’re here with the truth! 

In this comprehensive guide: 

  • What are German girls like – looks, attitude, and dating standards
  • 10 great reasons to date one (+ a few warnings)
  • Meeting them even if you speak zero German
  • The best singles nightlife and daytime locations in major German cities. 
  • How to impress a German girl (and why it may be easier than it seems)

German Girls: Myth Vs Reality

What do you picture when I say German woman? A chubby, pale, scary-looking Aryan lady? Or one of those girls in low-cut shits at the Oktoberfest? 

Well, the typical German girl is neither of those. Though she might wear a tavern maiden costume if you ask her nicely…

Are They ALL Supermodels? 

Heidi Klum, Claudia Shiffer, and Diane Kruger are all household names in the West. But will you meet your own Heidi in Berlin? Not necessarily. 

Ethnically German girls tend to be tall, blonde, and blue-eyed.

However, the skinny look is absolutely not in fashion right now. I think it’s because of all the eating disorder prevention campaigns. Dieting and actively trying to stay thin are frowned upon in Germany. It’s all about staying healthy, not stick-thin.  

German girls are also very low-maintenance. They prefer a natural look – no high heels, heavy makeup, or flashy jewellery. 

The typical everyday outfit consists of a messy bun, dark-wash jeans, a simple t-shirt or a sweater, and a large tote bag. In winter, they’re not afraid of bundle up. On colder days you can barely see their faces with the huge scarves and the fluffy hats! 

Immigrant German Girls

Germany has a huge Turkish diaspora and large immigrant groups from other countries, too. The first thing to know about these women: 

They’re not necessarily more open-minded than girls back home. 

I found Turkish girls in Berlin to be way more conservative than Turkish women in Turkey. I don’t have experience with Middle Eastern women in Germany. However, I have good reason to believe they’re the same. 

That said, you can meet some cute immigrants in Germany.

It’s a welcoming environment and many girls are second or even third-generation. They share a lot with German girls, even if they preserve their culture. 

Obviously, looks-wise immigrant girls are different. There are a lot of black and brown women in Germany, as well as other non-Aryan girls. This might be subjective, but find them to be more feminine. Turkish girls especially put a lot of effort into their looks. If high-maintenance is your thing, try to meet some Turks in Germany!

German People Are Total Squares!

This is a common stereotype and… Yes, it is kind of founded on reality. German people (and by extension, German girls): 

  • Are straightforward to an extreme degree.
  • Value punctuality and hate waiting.
  • Are fiercely independent. 
  • Love planning and leave little space for spontaneity. 
  • Are more reserved when you first meet them.
  • Prioritise school/their job over social life and dating. 

It’s not as bad as it sounds, though. German women’s biggest “sin” is they are way too blunt. All the other qualities – punctuality, honesty, ambition, aren’t exclusively German. The only thing that set Germans apart is they don’t always express themselves diplomatically. 

Scratch that. 

They never express themselves diplomatically. 

The biggest challenge when dating in Germany is despair. From the first time you meet a girl, she will be no-BS level straightforward. 

If she tells you that she’s not interested, you can’t change that. If you make a stupid joke, she won’t laugh to ease tension. If you do something she hates, she won’t avoid confrontation… It goes on and on, and this is why many foreign men find it hard to date Germans.  

On the plus side, Germans do know how to have fun. Just check out one of the many music festivals, or the LSD-powered Berlin nightlife scene. There is plenty of crazy, fun, spontaneous stuff going on in Germany, it’s not all work and no play!

How To Impress A German (And Should You?)

Impressing a German woman doesn’t include: 

  • Over-the-top compliments
  • A lot of “casual” touching while you talk
  • Offering to buy her a drink 

In fact, all three of these are pet peeves for German girls. Because they want to be independent and assert gender equality, subtle ‘macho’ behaviour is a turn-off. She can buy her own drinks, choose what she wants to get at the restaurant, and doesn’t need to be touched by a random guy at the bar. 

Ok, but what about compliments…? 

German girls value honesty above flattery. It’s not that they don’t like compliments, they hate dishonest ones. If you’re trying to get her to bed, you are better off just telling her that. Excessive compliments come across as insincere. 

That said, compliment her well and you’ve won the game!

German girls like to be complimented on: 

  • Their knowledge (i.e. you’re discussing a topic that she’s very well-informed about)
  • Career achievements (Wow, I can’t believe you’re an HR manager at just 25!)
  • The skills they have (not that kind of skills, you dirty-minded person… Stuff like languages, programming, or even mini-golf!)
  • Experiences they’ve had (travel, volunteering, being able to out-drink you)

Comments about her looks can work…personally, I don’t use them. German girls are a little more sensitive to subtle sexism. Even if you make a well-meaning and innocent comment, it can sound like a microaggression to her. An example: 

Dude: I love you in that dress, you look so feminine! 

Girl: Oh, so I can’t be feminine in pants? Jeez.. 

I’m not taking sides in this situation. However, there is clearly a misunderstanding and the girl gets offended (by the way, this is taken from an actual situation I witnessed). To avoid accidentally hurting your German crush’s feelings, don’t make compliments based on appearance. 

Ultimately, German girls either like you or they don’t. 

Their decision will be final either way. Your first encounter usually determines how the relationship goes… And trust me when I say, once she forms her opinion, it is set in stone. That’s why, rather than putting an outrageous amount of effort in impressing her, you should mostly focus on being yourself and not accidentally offending her. 

As cliché as this sounds, German girls hate men who pretend to be someone they’re not. You’d be smarter to tell her what you want (no need to be a caveman about it, obviously) and going with the flow. If she likes you, you’ll know… 

Meeting German Girls: The Club, The Park, Online… 

First things first: 

Pick-up lines don’t work in Germany. 

If you ask me, they barely work in other countries too… But that’s a topic for another day. 

German people are goal-oriented even in their daily routine. Women won’t appreciate you approaching them as a stranger. They have their agenda and are just trying to get from point A to point B. Talking to a foreign dude about their favourite Disney cartoon, whether they prefer cats or dogs, or their usual order at McDonalds. Before you ask, yes, these are all legitimate “conversation-starters” that I’ve seen tried (and failed) by wannabe pick-up artists. 

Approaching German Girls By Day

Normally, I would say don’t even try. Especially in winter, when it’s cold and gets dark early, everybody is rushing to get home/to their destination. They wouldn’t stop to talk to you. 

But what about malls, libraries, cafés…? 

Yes, these can work sometimes. Germans are a very reserved bunch so you’d see girls shopping, reading, sipping coffee by themselves. It’s not weird to hang out alone. These are the women you want to approach. 

Unfortunately, there is still a high chance of rejection. Because Germans are a private, introverted people, they enjoy being by themselves. In malls, for instance, you’ll see a lot of women shopping alone because it’s more efficient and they feel more confident. If you approach them, even if they think you’re cute, you still might get rejected because you appear at an incovenient time. 

For succesful day game focus on girls relaxing: 

  • In the park with a book in hand.
  • At a café, sipping their drink and people watching.
  • In the shopping centre food counter (but not while she’s gulping down her burger).

Don’t be a pushover. If she rejects you, move on to the next gal! 

Singles Nightlife In Germany: A Guide

The five biggest cities in Germany are: 

  • Berlin 
  • Hamburg
  • Munich
  • Cologne 
  • Frankfurt am Main

And here are all the best nightlife locations in them. Singles-friendly bars and clubs only!

Chat Up Berlin Babes 

Berlin is a great place to go out solo, even if it can be intimidating at first. It’s a large city with a lot of non-Berlin natives hanging around. People are more open to chatting with strangers – guys and girls alike. 

Before your night out, ask a local you fancy (or even a girl on Instagram/Tinder) about their favourite local brew, pub, and beer garden. It’s a great conversation-starter and it helps your cause with said girl. German women like to feel useful and appreciated. 

Anyway, onto my favourite pick-up locations in Berlin: 

  • RAW Gelände is a former train-repair yard turned cultural and nightlife hotspot. There are restaurants, bars, beer gardens, clubs… Even an indoor climbing wall, a hidden swimming pool and a skate park! You can spend an entire 24 hours here and not get bored. While it attracts a more ‘alternative’ crowd, it’s predominantly local and I found girls here to be the friendliest!
  • Berghain is Berlin’s temple of techno, located in the same district as the RAW buildings (Friedrichshain). Located in a former power plant, it can hold up to 1500 people and it’s an electronic music lover’s paradise. The hardcore party atmosphere (and the drinks that flow) will definitely help meet Berlin cuties. 
  • Schlesisches Tor area is home to Köpenicker Straße (full of lively bars for pre-drinks), Lido, the most intimate of all large Berlin concert venue (meaning that it attracts a lot of people but it’s also a good atmosphere for rubbing shoulders with local hotties), Club der Visionäre on the riverbank for dancing and drinks by the waterfront.

Hamburg: Best Nightlife… Ever? 

Hamburg nights out were recently voted the best in Europe (by a Hostelworld survey). Nightlife here includes options for all ages, styles, and budgets… And, should I add, tastes in women. Anyway, here are some must-visit locations: 

  • The Feuerschiff is a former lightship on the river Elbe and (almost unanimously) agreed to be the best concert venue in the city. The atmosphere is hard to beat for sure!
  • Halo and Villa Nova in the St Pauli party district are perfect for meeting hot Hamburg students. Both are electronic/house music clubs. If you prefer something different, Molotow is an alt-music heaven to pick up chicks with septum piercings and tattoo sleeves. 
  • Mojo is a dancefloor jazz spot and the perfect place to meet older(ish) Hamburg women. Think 25-35 age range, while other spots in the area are mostly full of students. 

Munich: Beyond Beer

While Munich is mostly famous for it’s beer, there are still some hot nightlife spots that don’t involve any craft brew. Not that there is something wrong with a beer garden… 

  • Harry Klein is tiny, super popular, and always packed. While you might have to wait in a line, you’ll be rewarded when you see Munich’s prettiest girls party here. 
  • Milla is somewhere between a bar and a disco (on the nightlife spectrum) and it’s totally underground. The music ranges from 90’s hip hop to jazz and alt-rock, the crowd is low-key but friendly, and it’s almost 100% local-only!
  • Nv, easily the best hookah bar in Munich, hosts DJ parties on the weekends and it’s the perfect spot to meet ‘glitzier’ local women. While most German girls go out in jeans and a low-cut top, you don’t even get in Nv in casual clothes. The same rule applies to guys so dress up!

Cologne: The Rival 

When DJ Mag places Cologne club Bootshaus as the best German club, Berliners were furious! Best club in Germany not in Berlin? Well, I guess so. 

While I’m not taking any sides here, Cologne is an amazing nightlife destination in itself. And nightlife = opportunities to meet cute German girls! Check out: 

  • Sixpack is the epicentre of the night-time rush. It attracts a vibrant crowd of party people and serves as a gateway to the Cologne nightlife extravaganza. 
  • The famous Bootshaus that we already talked about. It’s your little piece of heaven when it comes to electronic music and pretty locals. Of course, the cover is… worthy of a large and famous club. 
  • Arkadia is an 80’s style disco complete with all the era-appropriate décor + a comfy laid-back area if dancing is not your thing. It’s not your typical “get blackout drunk and jump around to Beyoncé” club, making it perfect for meeting new people! 

Frankfurt: Boring?!?

Don’t let Frankfurt’s reputation as the financial capital of Germany fool you. The city is anything but boring! Here are the insider’s tips to picking girls up at one of Frankfurt’s hot singles nightlife locations: 

  • The bars at Berger Straße are the perfect place to start your night. Good beer, a friendly crowd (the alcohol helps with that), and occasionally string lights? It could be the start of an epic singles night or a perfect date plan. 
  • Check out Odeon next for a night of drinking and dancing. Tired? Head to the upstairs terrace for a breather (or to approach girls in a more quiet space). 
  • For alternative music (that still doesn’t go too far off the beaten track), check out The Cave in the centre. With frequent live music performances and a colourful crowd, it’s always an exciting (and sometimes surprising) place to check out. 

Meet German Girls Online

Online dating is the future. And yes, I don’t like myself for saying this, but it’s true.

Young Germans are predominantly looking for partners online or in their social circle. It’s a country of introverts and career-focused people. Of course they’ll love online dating!

As a foreigner, Internet dating equals no language barrier. As long as you stick to English-based sites, of course, but it’s much easier than approaching strangers on the street. English levels are pretty solid in Germany. Even so, international dating sites help you meet singles that actively seek a relationship with a traveler/expat. So let’s check them out!

(If you want to learn how to speak German, check out this post)

Tinder In Germany

Germans are pretty open-minded when it comes to casual sex. That said, you can easily meet your future wife on Tinder, too. It’s a casual dating app but not hookup central. Swipe around, go on a few dates, see what happens. 

Reminder: tell the girl what you’re looking for. If it’s a one-night stand, it’s a one-night stand. German girls can smell fakes from a mile away. And they don’t mind no-strings-attached.

German Cupid: Relationships With German Girls

German Cupid is for relationship-minded people. It requires more time (to make your profile, fill it out, browse through potential matches, etc.) and a premium membership (which comes with a monthly fee). 

Higher investment = People aren’t looking for short-term things.  

And since it’s German girls we’re talking about, they won’t tolerate BS. If you’re only trying to get them in bed, German Cupid isn’t for you. If you want a German girlfriend – totally!

So how do you chat up a German girl online?

Start small and let her take the initiative. Unlike other countries, Germany is big on gender equality and girls don’t mind making the first step. Say “Hi, just wanted to say cute ___ (puppy in your pictures for example)!” and leave it at that. She’ll be taken aback a little bit but it will work out in your favour in the end. 

Wait.. How? 

You’re not begging her for attention. All you do is give her a conversation starter, spark her interest if you will. Then, she has to invest in the conversation, too. Independent, “modern badass woman” Germans appreciate that a lot. 

Other Dating Apps And Sites

If you speak German, you can try out Finya, which is a local dating site. Unfortunately, it’s only in German but otherwise, it’s one of the most popular options in Germany. Check it out, it’s free!

OkCupid exists in Germany but it’s only useful in bigger cities or near large universities. On the plus side, it doesn’t cost anything, though premium membership is available. I noticed older women liked OkCupid better (or at least people ready to settle down). 

Badoo is basically Tinder with more advanced location services. It shows you users nearby based on similar interests. Germans do use Badoo but, again, it’s best reserved for bigger cities. 

German Girls

10 Great Reasons To Date German Girls

Instead of closing with a clichéd “good luck with German girls”, let me remind you why you want to date Germans… Even if they are a lot to handle!

  1. Refreshingly honest
  2. Open-minded AF (so casual dating, random hookups, and long-term coupling are all on the table)
  3. Beautiful (and you’ll meet classical beauties, as well as exotic cuties)
  4. Loyal and proud of it (cheating is a big no-no in Germany – if she’s staying with you, she 100% wants to)
  5. She brings out the best in you (because she’s not afraid to call you out on your BS or compliment you when you deserve it)
  6. Organised and reliable (meaning she’s never late, your home will be neat and beautiful, and she keeps her promises as a matter of honour)
  7. Open-minded and enjoys expanding her horizons
  8. Her interests go beyond reality TV 
  9. Comfortable with her body (there’s a reason why topless beaches and naked spas are so popular in Germany!)
  10. Long-term commitment (while casual dating is ok, most German girls are looking for a boyfriend and they’re ready to commit)

But, of course, it’s not all sunshine and roses. German girls are outspoken, independet, and no-BS. If you can’t handle that, better look for a softer, gentler girl. Maybe Eastern Europeans? 

One thing is for sure, though: 

If you’re up for the challenge, German girls are awesome!

Do you have your own experiences with them? Make sure to share them in the comments below! 

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