Pick Up Mexican Women: A Gringo's Guide - This Is Trouble

Pick Up Mexican Women: A Gringo’s Guide

(This post about Mexican women comes courtesy of my pal El Conquistador).

Guys approach and message me all the time saying that they’re tired of banging Tinder skanks in Latin America and want to find a good girl. A Latin girlfriend. The “one”.

Latin wife sounds great in theory. They’re beautiful and have the best motherly instincts out of all the women I’ve met on my travels.

Finding a wife in Latin America should be easy too — a lot of them want to marry a guy from the US or Europe.

But finding a marriage-worthy one is difficult. Latin women are like extreme weather: volatile, unreliable and difficult to trust.

If you are man enough to take on the challenge, where in Latin America should you start your search?

Exploring the Americas

I’ve visited almost every country in Latin America (barring Paraguay). Here is my opinion on the relative wife-merits of Latin women from various countries:

  • Venezuela, The Dominican Republic , Cuba: all about the $. Hot as hell to look at but extreme gold diggers
  • Argentina : Pain in the ass. Go to Italy if you want to put up with women like that
  • Chile : Too Westernized and plain-looking
  • Paraguay: Who knows?
  • Ecuador & Bolivia: Bad genes
  • Colombia : Sexy and untrustworthy to equal degrees
  • Peru : A few rich girls with Spanish blood living in Lima (Miraflores or SanIsidrio) are worth a roll of the dice.
  • Central America: Potential but too hit-or-miss

That leaves either Brazil or Mexico. Brazil is a great choice  but most men should start their search for a girlfriend in the land of Pulque and beans.

Side note : I’m talking about Mexican women in Mexico, not those in the US. That’s a whole different ball game.

Mexican girls (those outside of DF) are less likely to cheat, are family oriented, and are the most career-minded and hard-working women in Latin America.

I know what you’re thinking: “Most hard-working in Latin America? That’s not difficult!”

Well, for me it’s a dealmaker. And the more I think about settling down in Mexico, the better it seems. The economy is growing. I could live like a king on $ 3,000 per month, enjoying great weather and lounging in my villa while my wife Alejandra Espinoza runs after the two little El Conquistadors.

Also it’s close enough to the US that I can go shopping in San Antonio for Martin Luther King weekend.

Back to Reality Regarding Mexican Women

Now that you’re sold on Mexican women, I’m going to tell you:

  1. Where in the country you’ll find the best Mexican women
  2. What do you do when you get there?

Sound good?

It’s okay.

First here are a few places in Mexico NOT TO GO:

  • Cancun & Puerto  Vallarta : It would take a whole blog post for me to explain why I hate those places
  • Northern border towns : drug cartels severing the heads of politicians and police chiefs willhinder your seduction efforts. Although you will see some great looking girls in Chihuahua and Nuevo Leon
  • The South : girls are too Mayan-looking

That leaves central Mexico. Specifically, the Big 3.

If you are new to Mexico and your Spanish is intermediate or less, I advise visiting the 3 biggest cities in the country. From least recommended to most:

  1. Guadalajara: The Medellin of Mexico. Dozens of Mexican men have told me that the most beautiful women in Mexico come from the state of Jalisco. I went to see for myself and I think that’s bullshit.
  2. Monterrey: Good news, it’s a lot safer than it was. Girls from Monterrey are some of the friendliest girls in Mexico. There is a fear of foreigners and Catholics guilt in most of Mexico but Monterrey is an exception.
  3. DF (Mexico City): The New York of Latin America. Hook-up culture is normal here. Go out in the Condesa area and you’ll see what I mean.

Mexico City is where you can overcome the No. 1 biggest clockblock in all of Mexico. I guarantee this obstacle will blue-ball you more than anything else.

It is not protective friends, “strawberry” bitch shields or Montezuma’s revenge.

Want to know?

The biggest obstacle to sleeping with hot Mexican women is the fact that most of the girls you want to live with either their parents or with host families.

But DF is the only Mexican city where you will find lots of girls who live with roommates. This means they can stay over at yours, come back after midnight, whatever.

If your future Mexican girlfriend does not live in Mexico City, you’ll have to separate her from her friends and family; difficult but not impossible with some creative game.

OKAY. Now you know where to go What do you do when you get there?

Game 2.0

Want to know the No.1 mistake gringos make when they try to get laid with lots of Mexican women?

Answer: Not being social enough.

Most guys I’ve met on the gringo trial in Latin America spend their time either prowling the malls alone like sharks and do not open their mouths until they see the hot girl by herself.

Or they are stuck in their AirBNB lodging getting jacked thumbs by swiping on Tinder all day or messaging on Latin American Cupid.

These sites can bring you lots of leads but it’s the dose makes the poison. You will not make friends on Tinder or Latin or Mexican Cupid.

“Why the fuck do I want to make friends El Conquistador? I just want to slide into some Mexican pussy until I’m balls deep.”

I hear ya.

But I’m selling you what you want and giving you what you need here. You have to be the “outgoing gringo” that talks to everybody.

Not only that, you need to penetrate the social circles and parties where most of the hooking-up happens in Mexico. Teaching English and playing sports were my way in while I lived in there. Take an inventory of your skills and interests, and leverage them to make some local friends.

Once you’ve got those local contacts, tell them you’re looking for pretty Mexican women. It works.

Cockblocked by The Whole Country 

Outside of the liberal capital city, Mexico remains a very catholic country. Most Mexican women still meet partners through their family, school friends and extended family.

This is not a bad thing. If you can turn this around and use it to your advantage, you’ll hook up with impossible-to-get women.

Like Alejandra Espinoza.

But she’s mine. I know she’s married but she just does not understand what a sweet guy I am.

Happy hunting.

A hug,

– The Conqueror

PS: Make sure to brush up on your Spanish and pipeline some girls on Mexican Cupid before you go. 

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