She passed me on the street, and I didn’t hesitate.
I turned around within five seconds and ran after her. Flowing dark brown hair, blue eyes, and a bit of a tired, boring attire that suggested she was on her way home from work.
Right as I caught her and pulled alongside, she started to run. The crosswalk ahead wouldn’t stay green for very much longer. Knowing it was now or never, I briefly quickened my stride and pulled out just ahead of her, while simultaneously lighting tapping her on the arm.
I opened my mouth and words came out.
“Hi. I saw you walk by me, and thought you were really cute. I just knew I’d regret it if I didn’t stop and meet you.”
Her eyes spazzed out slightly in shock as she took in the situation. Her reply:
“Wow, thank you”, with a big smile.
“But I’m so sorry, I have to catch this bus. Thank you so much!”
And just like that, she was gone with another skip in her step, rushing off to catch her bus. The bus that would take her from her 9-5 cubicle job that she probably despises, back to her flat wherever she lives. There, she’ll heat up a meal in a packaged box, plop down in front of the television, and sit there until it’s time to sleep.
Tomorrow, she’ll rise and do it all again.
I’m going to be honest here, and come right out to say that I’m not a pro daygamer. I briefly did a bit several years ago, but with my own 9-5 slave job, I just never got around to truly mastering it. With that being said, I’m not a total amateur. My overall game and conversation skills are top notch. I’d already made a few dozen daygame approaches in my life, even getting some numbers and bangs. So whilst I’m not a rookie, I’m also smart enough to know that I’m rusty, and not 100% calibrated. It’s going to take some practice to get good.
However, I’m also good enough with girls to know that this specific girl wasn’t creeped out by me. She was genuinely flattered. The way her eyes sparkled slightly suggested she had some interest. Therefore, the question automatically becomes…
Why didn’t she stop longer?
Think about it. She didn’t know who I was, but wasn’t totally freaked out by me. Who knows what I could be for her. What if I was her future husband the father to her children? What if I could provide in such a way she never had to return to the job she hated?
(Yes, I am making assumptions on that – but many people here have a very tired and downtrodden look at the end of the day. I can spot misery a mile away, because it wasn’t all that long ago that I was the miserable one walking home.)
We’re assuming a lot here, but in my mind this is what every girl’s fantasy is. To not meet a guy in a sleazy bar or club, but to instead be stopped and charmed by a confident man on the street.
You’d think that she’d be willing to spend 30 seconds with me to find all of the above out. To find out my potential, where I’m from, whether she could see herself going on a date with me. Whether she could brag to all of her friends about the guy who ran down the street to catch her because he couldn’t resist himself.
The bus was more important.
Was my game perfect – no, absolutely not. I was too hustled to catch her, and too hustled with my speech. It was not a perfect attempt. However, it was good enough. Good enough for her to stop and give herself that chance to meet me.
I’m not going to lie, this new reality has been tough for me to take in. But after having several similar encounters in the last couple of days (where the girls were clearly intrigued, not creeped out, but had to rush off to something), I’m feeling pretty comfortable with stating this: girls are simply not putting men as a priority.
For the record, they’re still far more receptive to men than in America – while out at night recently, a friend of mine remarked to me that he could tell that men and women here don’t hate each other like they often do in the West.
However, this new reality of mine was definitely a reality check for myself. I think the issue lies somewhere in the middle of culture and biology. Culture tells women that they have all the time in the world to find a man these days, so to think outside of that box would require them to turn off the hamster to admit it.
I’m left with no choice – get better.
It’s time to start.
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