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Single Guy Move Vs. Married Man Move

As I mentioned recently, I moved to a different neighborhood of San Diego to the tune of some major savings. The weekend before, I moved one of my best friends whom I have known and worked with for nearly the last decade, since I was about 14. Let’s give a quick breakdown of the moving situations.

ME: 23 years old, single (not married, but girlfriend), one bedroom apartment, one old Honda Accord. Made about $70,000 last year.

FRIEND: 33 years old, married for 1.5 years, one kid (one year), another kid on the way (due in November), 4 bedroom/4 bath house, three cars (wife’s sedan, classic Mustang, large SUV), made just shy of $100k last year.

Now, we’re obviously at different points in life. He’s one of the more alpha guys I know, believe it or not. When we worked together in a computer shop, he hired cute girls to be our sales girls. He’d fuck them in the break room, fire them, and they’d still see him. He estimates his notch count is 300+, and I do not doubt this one bit. He was the star high school and college athlete, drank and did a lot of drugs, and lives a different life now. Says he’s happy – sometimes.

Anyways.

The real point of this post is to illustrate the massive amount of SHIT you acquire when you are married and live with a woman.

MY MOVE: 2 hours, hired two Mexicans and a truck, one trip. Total cost with gas and tip = $160

FRIEND’S MOVE: 12 hours, 4-6 people at ALL times, a dozen trips. Total cost (gas + trailer + pizza & booze for helpers) = he estimated $500

The thing is – none of the fucking stuff was his. 

Sure, he has a mountain bike and sports gear. And the TV is “his”, though she probably watches it more than he does. But all the furniture he bought because she wanted it, we could have filled a landfill with the amount of clothes packed, and I helped him move from a one bedroom to a condo just three years ago and it took us all of 3 hours.

Now just the art of moving involves an entire 12 hour workday just to transport the heavy items – not counting the countless other trips taken in the week leading up to it. My personal favorite worthless shit we moved:

  • Sewing machine
  • Hot tub (okay, not worthless…but a pain)
  • 3 couches. THREE.
  • An entire walk in closet of baby clothes.
  • 4 strollers
  • A baby changing station that felt about 300 pounds.

So the lesson to be learned – don’t get married, unless you wish to overpay for a large house that will ultimately become a landfill of worthless shit your wife can hardly appreciate.

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  • August 6, 2014
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