38

Men Are More Resourceful Than Women

This post spawned from my post about my little sister.

If you Google “getting over a boyfriend”, you’ll return 218,000,000 hits.

If you Google “getting over a girlfriend”, you’ll return 330,000,000 hits.

Based off of these extremely easy to come by statistics, we can conclude two things.

  1. Women are generally, less upset than men when it comes to breakups.
  2. Men are, perhaps as a result of #1, more resourceful than women.

Let’s break both items down.

Women Are Less Upset

This one is easy to understand for the majority of women, until they hit the good ‘ol Wall when things come crashing down.  Post breakup, even if she is a “nice” girl, any decent looking woman has a plethora of options to explore upon entering the realm of being single.  She’s got the boys on Facebook liking her statuses, OKCupid offering her guys left and right, and probably several other co-workers and whatnot who would love nothing more than to validate her worth as a woman by sticking their dick into her warm wet hole.  On top of this, she’s got girlfriends/parents/betas telling her, “What an asshole,” that guy was, and that she, “Has plenty of time to find a nice guy (bullshit).”

Taking account for the fact that men are probably more likely to seek out Google for answers than women – women just don’t have as much reason to.  It’s that simple.  Let’s take this fictional story for example:

Dan and Sarah live together in the same dorm.  It is their freshman year at college.  Sarah is a cheerleader for the school, while Dan, while a cool guy, is a relatively simple guy.  He majors in business finance and plays guitar in his free time.  Sarah majors in Communications and most of her free time, when not performing, is spent out with her cheerleading friends; going to parties, school events, etc.  Dan courts Sarah at the end of freshman year.  They go on a couple dates, have sex, and continue to date for the remainder of the year; and into the summer.  Two years later, junior year, they move into an apartment, together.  Near the end of their lease, they decide, mutually, to break it off.

Both Dan and Sarah head to downtown that night with their respective groups of guys and girls.  Dan’s boys want him to find a new girl to bang, and Sarah’s girlfriends are encouraging her to “find someone cute.”

The question readers, is as follows: who will have it more difficult?

  1. Will it be Sarah finding a guy willing to put his dick inside of her?
  2. Or Dan finding a girl willing to let him put his dick in her warm hole?

If you even thought about answering #1, then you need to actually go out on a few dates, hit a few bars, and reevaluate your position in life.  You’re fucking clueless.  Game or not, a girl is always going to have it easier.  Sarah could walk into a bar and yell, “Who wants to fuck?”, and she’s have a line longer than the ladies restroom of dudes willing to line up and be at her beck and call.  Note, this concept does not apply to fatties.

So it’s very likely a girl would not even turn to the Internet for answers.  She simply cries to her girlfriends, and then goes to the bar to find new dick.

Men Are More Resourceful

On the flip side, unless Dan has mad game, or gets really lucky, he isn’t going to have as easy as a time picking up a new girl to fuck.  Your average guy probably goes through a dry spell post-breakup.  Most won’t have the ability to go out and seduce a new girl just hours after breaking up.  A guy has to do more than show up at a bar to find some pussy.  He has to be willing to make the approach, jump through the hoops, and handle all the logistics.  Most guys don’t have that ability.  So instead…

They turn to the Internet.  Hey, this was me at one point.  I’ve Google’d for dating advice countless times in my life, until I started to figure it all out.  We, as men, are forced to be more resourceful simply because we don’t have such an easy escape from it.  Sure, it’s the circumstances provided that cause us to be forced into it, but do you really think women would have the ability to create communities such as what you see on RSD, Chateau, PUA forums, etc?  I doubt it.  It’s a survival skill; men are forced to navigate through the tough times.  Men can’t tell the guys how we really feel, because we’d look like too much of pussies.  Men are forced to face our inner demons, seek anonymous help on the Internet, and build large communities that can be a resource for future men with the same problem.  Men are forced to conquer their fear, get back out there, and search for love, sex, and companionship from square zero (unless you’re spinning plates…which you should be).

Men can’t just walk into a bar and spread their legs.

Read More: Respecting a Girl After Sex on the First Date

  • I definitely agree with this post for the most part, but since I am a woman, I know “getting over” break-ups is not as easy as the few hundred words in this post. It’s difficult for both genders, probably yes, a tad bit harder for guys than girls due to the whole “I have to be masculine and look like I don’t give a shit” attitude. Physically? Oh yes. Women have it WAY easier. Shoot, if I had enough time to tell you about how much easier physically getting over my ex this last 7 months has been I would, but I think you get the point ;). I don’t count the physical though because that’s not really getting over your ex, that’s just satisfying your sexual needs when porn doesn’t cut it. Emotionally, however, it varies. Guys might not want to share their feelings publicly, but not all girls do either. It took me a long time and countless anonymous blogging communities to admit how hurt I was, and I still hold my “don’t give a shit on the outside” attitude. But it wasn’t until I started reading guys’ posts about their break-ups that I realized how difficult it was for them too. Guys are just great at hiding it. Thanks for the inside scoop. Your blog is awesome, for reals.

    • Thank you for the kind words. As well as for the rational, well-thought out comment rather than the rage-filled comments most people with vaginas leave on my blog.

      Since you are a logical girl and based off your thumbnail, let me give you some advice. Read these posts before you continue to “physically” get over someone.

      http://thisblogistrouble.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/respecting-a-girl-after-sex-on-the-first-date/

      http://thisblogistrouble.wordpress.com/2013/07/07/honest-advice-for-my-college-aged-female-friends/

      http://laidnyc.wordpress.com/2013/09/06/i-hit-it-first-why-your-girls-sexual-past-matters/

      Your homework assignment is to read these and then comment here again with your thoughts.

      • ** based off your thumbnail, you appear to be cute…is what that was supposed to say.

      • Haha, thanks for the good reads and advice. Regarding my past relationship, I’m as over that as can be. Sure, it still stings a little bit but that’s because I was in love. No harm, no foul. I’ve definitely figured out over this whole dating thing that if I do want something wholesome, I’m going to have to act, well, wholesome. And usually, I do. I mean, hey, I love sex. I’m no stranger to the one nighter and I’ve done my fair share of screw, and well, screw. But I’m also a hopeless romantic deep down inside of my outer-sexual-heart, so I just have to have some self control with the ones that I actually want to see again. A “happy medium” if you will. Obviously, I know how men work. They don’t want to talk to a girl again who will give it up that easy. That’s a given. I’m “dating” if you will, someone at the moment and we haven’t slept together even though it’s killing me, but I like him so I can totally handle it. As for “physically” getting over my ex, that’s not why I have a sex. I have sex because I love it. And I have needs. And when you’re single, sometimes doing it yourself isn’t as fun. I’m not like most girls, or most people in fact. There’s a method to my madness and by madness I definitely don’t mean bat shit crazy.” I agree with most of those blog posts, but they don’t necessarily correlate to myself. Good reads, good advice, food for thought. Thanks 🙂

      • Correct, most girls do love sex (assuming they can find a guy who can give it to them good – and it amazes me how many guys apparently can’t…).

        What I’m saying though is that if eventually you want to settle down with a strong man, not a little beta pussy, you should try to keep your numbers down. Men like me who have lots of value have no reason to commit to the slut whose slept with 30 guys because we’ll get it for free.

        Or, I suppose you could always just lie; but that’s not the way I live my life.

        Good, well thought out post again though. +3.

      • Holy wish wash, your double standards are piling up! Why is a girl who sleeps with 30 guys a slut, while you whose blog is aaaallll about sleeping with women, not a slut?

      • Biology. I didn’t say it was fair. Men are more likely to commit to women who are chaste, whilst women are more attracted to, and tend to seek commitment from the alpha males who have their fair share of picking of women. It’s just biological: pre-selection.

        Check out heartiste.wordpress.com for a lot of articles about why this is true.

      • Yeah, but what about men and women who don’t talk about their past partners? I’ve never talked about my past with anyone I’m in a relationship with and vise versa. Furthermore, I’m definitely not attracted to big ol’ alpha males (unless it was Alcide from True Blood, color me a wolf fanatic). Nor am I attracted to men who ladies swoon over. And I’m sure I’ll have no problem having a man who digs my love of sex for eternity. Does that make me weird? Probably. I don’t like statistics for that reason. I’m definitely no average-I am the standard deviation faaar off to the left or right. And my taste in men is just the same

      • Those men are fools if they don’t ask. If they can live in that ignorance, more power to them. I’ve had my eyes opened, I can’t (parts of me wish I could go back to blissfully ignorant). And, to be honest, that’s most of the men in today’s world. The people who read my blog and the people I reference are a small minority. Personally, I ask how many past partners on the first date. Yes, FIRST date. That lets me size things up, and I know the higher the number, the more likely it is she will cheat, and the more likely it is that there will be more drama, in general. LaidNYC’s post does a better job explaining it.

        What is your number, out of curiosity? Since we’ll never meet I won’t judge 😉

        You’re thinking alpha purely from a physical sense, I think. I simply mean a guy who leads, takes control, and doesn’t fear you. You sound like the kind of girl who wants control, so no, you will have no issue finding a man. There’s also a 50/50 shot you may decide he bores you after a few years and decide to go the divorce route.

      • Whaaa? First date? That’s insane. Anyone who answers you on the first date is silly. Yes, maybe you’re right, the more LIKELY they’ll cheat, if you want to bring this back to math, but that’s not always the case. You could be losing out on a really great person who could make you happy indefinitely all because of how many people she slept with? HA! My number is personal. It’s not super high-based on your definition of a slut, I don’t think I’d fall in that realm to you, but nonetheless it’s none of your business 🙂 furthermore, just because I like to have sex doesn’t mean I’m going to cheat. Statistically, maybe, but personally, no. I’ve known plenty of cases where women who don’t have a lot of sexual partners cheat. What does that tell you?

      • Then apparently they’re all insane because 90% answer me. Of course there are exceptions to the rule, etc. However, if a guy is thinking about long term and marriage the odds are already stacked heavily against him. Why make it even worse statistically for himself?

        “I’ve known plenty of cases where women who don’t have a lot of sexual partners cheat.”

        It tells me their guy didn’t screen well enough, and didn’t have strong enough frame.

        “furthermore, just because I like to have sex doesn’t mean I’m going to cheat. Statistically, maybe, but personally, no.”

        This makes no sense. Statistics are FACT. If you have had more partners, you will be at a higher risk for cheating.

  • Oh and Shit, I forgot to comment on your advice to your college girl____friends. Haha, first off, if you just switched that around and made it for girls to guys, it would be EXACTLY the same. Girls care about looks. For sure. I’ll give it 81% looks, just because I wanted to go all “price is right” on you. With all the dating and guy meeting I’ve done, I’m sorry (well, actually I’m not sorry at all), but if I’m not attracted to a guy, I WILL NOT give him a chance. Point blank period. But we all have different attractions to people. A girl you think is smokin’ may be “alright” to one of your friends and vise versa. But this whole “looks are important” thing is so obvious. Nobody wants to admit their vain, but shit, I’ll admit it for them. It’s not gender specific at all.

    As for the second part of your post, guys should take note of the same thing. I’d prefer NOT to have a guy that lives off of anything he can put in the microwave. Fuck that “Imma cook and clean and be a housewife” shit. If you want me to clean, you sure as hell are cookin’. And something damn good at that. Basically, I’m an equal opportunity employer and quite frankly, your advice should be given to guys as well.

    P.S. If I have to stop wearing my yoga pants, then you need to stop wearing fucking basketball shorts everywhere too. 90% of guys don’t even play basketball. I yoga naked, anyways.

    🙂 Done!

    • But with you girls, it goes deeper than on the surface. A man can improve his “look” with body language, style, working out, etc. That’s why you can see fat, ugly guys with hot girls: they have mad game and have everything else going for them physically.

      Men have multiple ways to make themselves more attractive, like I said. Money, style, gym, experience, confidence, body language, cockiness….the list goes on and on.

      Women have two things. Physical beauty, and pleasant personality. And we all know that guys would rather be with the crazy hot bitch than the pleasant fatty.

      • Ha! That is so unbelievably sexist. And in no way am I a feminist, but you’re starting to make me consider it. Not all men are the men you describe. I think you’re making this personal because this is the type of man YOU want to be and with a woman that YOU want. First of all, I’m going to put style, gym, experience, and body language ALL in “physical beauty” and cockiness can get thrown into the personality category. So, as you see, I can lump you all into two categories too! Second, cockiness does NOT attract all women. In fact, I think cockiness is a total turn off/deal breaker/don’t even talk to me type of thing. Confidence is where it’s at, both with men and women. Many men think confidence in a woman is very attractive, not just having a “pleasant personality.” And yes, actually, many men out there care about how much money a woman makes, how independent she is, etc.

      • I’ll give you this: I am strong-willed and set enough that if I decided to settle down, I would be perfectly content with a submissive girl who wanted to stay home, cook, and clean all day.

        I am not making this personal. I’m simply the guy willing to ADMIT that beauty is what matters more than anything. Most guys will feed you the bullshit, “It’s on the inside that counts.” I don’t sugarcoat.

        And finally, to the style/gym/experience/body language thing. You can take a fat guy, give him cool clothes and good body language and he might do OK with women.

        Take a fat girl and give her cool clothes and body language and she will see no uptick in male attention.

  • Alas, sir, we could go on all day. You can’t convince me of your views and I can’t convince you of mine. That’s okay, though, you’re completely entitled to your opinion. You may be a little sexist, but I think somewhere deep down inside of you and your wet briefs, you’re actually a sweet guy that may see women differently someday. Either way, I think we can both agree that we’re doing just fine in our dating and sex lives. Have to agree on something right? Solid blog, anyways. Your honesty is refreshing, even if people don’t agree with it.

    • Thank you again for the nice comments! I can agree to disagree. Please don’t let our spirited debate hold you back from commenting on my future posts 🙂

      • sweet 🙂 I think a healthy debate between two opposing forces is healthy. And we are forces, you know that? At least I know I am. Just know the human experience is a case by case basis, and I understand why you use statistics to protect yourself from being misused or misunderstood. Just don’t let go of every person who doesn’t meet your criteria. If you get good vibes and a fuzzy feeling (that isn’t an erection) from someone you didn’t think could do that, go with it. That lady might pleasantly surprise you and change your whole world around. Take care trouble maker.

  • Alas, sir, we could go on all day. You can’t convince me of your views and I can’t convince you of mine. That’s okay, though, you’re completely entitled to your opinion. You may be a little sexist, but I think somewhere deep down inside of you and your wet briefs, you’re actually a sweet guy that may see women differently someday. Either way, I think we can both agree that we’re doing just fine in our dating and sex lives. Have to agree on something right? Solid blog, anyways. Your honesty is refreshing, even if people don’t agree with it.

    • Thank you again for the nice comments! I can agree to disagree. Please don’t let our spirited debate hold you back from commenting on my future posts 🙂

      • sweet 🙂 I think a healthy debate between two opposing forces is healthy. And we are forces, you know that? At least I know I am. Just know the human experience is a case by case basis, and I understand why you use statistics to protect yourself from being misused or misunderstood. Just don’t let go of every person who doesn’t meet your criteria. If you get good vibes and a fuzzy feeling (that isn’t an erection) from someone you didn’t think could do that, go with it. That lady might pleasantly surprise you and change your whole world around. Take care trouble maker.

  • “furthermore, just because I like to have sex doesn’t mean I’m going to cheat. Statistically, maybe, but personally, no.”

    This makes no sense. Statistics are FACT. If you have had more partners, you will be at a higher risk for cheating.

    Yes, I meant okay according to your MATH that can be seen as LIKELY. Statistics are fact, but the average doesn’t mean that’s how every person in the population will act. That means, that’s how the average person will act. That doesn’t mean that’s how I will act. Or Susie Q. Or everyone else on the outer edge of that average statistically significant number.

    I get what you mean. I’m just saying that just because I, personally like sex doesn’t mean I’m gonna cheat on my partner. Someone else who has had just as many partners as I may, but not me. I’ve never done that, never been enticed, and never will. Just sayin’

    • grace9303 says:

      So I’m slightly embarrased that I just read a blog argument, but that was entertaining. I’m glad you stuck up for yourself, because you’re right. Assuming that everyone fits into the majority of a statistic would cause you to pass by a lot of amazing people. If I did that, I wouldn’t go on any blind dates with Americans because they might be fat.

      And cheers to another somewhat promiscuous girl who has never cheated! Pretty sure there are a lot of us.

      • grace9303 says:

        I’m also slightly embarrassed that I can’t spell.

      • Ahhh thank you, thank you! It’s true, though. I can see where he’s coming from. I just could never choose a mate based on statistical probability. Correlation does not mean causation. Unless his statistics were based on serious scientific testing where you could control the variables being studied, you can never tell for certain if one causes the other. It’s statistically proven that women with large breasts are more likely to get breast cancer. Does that mean ALL women with large breasts get cancer? No. Does that mean all small breasted women never get breast cancer? Also, no.

        Hats off to you, girl. I’m serious when I say that I’ve never had the desire to cheat on a partner. I pride myself on my monogamy without exception. If I didn’t love my partner enough that I wanted to cheat, I would break things off. Better to let him go than string him and his heart along. There are definitely a lot of us, just not as many believers. Thanks for the comment, lady ! 🙂

      • Apparently, you ladies never ran across someone like me while you were in a relationship 😉

  • […] 1.) Men Are More Resourceful Than Women […]

  • […] 1.) Men Are More Resourceful Than Women […]

  • Yiannis says:

    Lol, I admit going through most of this conversation as well. I am a guy (closer to Alpha than Beta if you need to know:) but I identify with intothebeauty as I do not represent the average either. Statistics is just that, trying to draw some average conclusions. But statistics cannot really predict anything with certainty in the real world. It’s useful knowing and playing the percentages but you need to watch out for the “exceptions”. We “exceptions” are so often mistaken for someone else, just because other people find it easier to categorize according to whatever theory they have in mind, rather than try to get to know you without prejudice.

  • Yiannis says:

    Lol, I admit going through most of this conversation as well. I am a guy (closer to Alpha than Beta if you need to know:) but I identify with intothebeauty as I do not represent the average either. Statistics is just that, trying to draw some average conclusions. But statistics cannot really predict anything with certainty in the real world. It’s useful knowing and playing the percentages but you need to watch out for the “exceptions”. We “exceptions” are so often mistaken for someone else, just because other people find it easier to categorize according to whatever theory they have in mind, rather than try to get to know you without prejudice.

  • >