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Damnit Girls, Stop Stalking Me


Another damn girl found my blog.

EDITOR’S NOTE: This was written back in May when there was a risk of her reading this and spilling the beans to my girl. Now, I’ll never see again — so all’s fair.

But guess what, this one wasn’t my girl.

In one month, TWO girls that my ROOMMATE has gone out with have successfully found my blog – disturbing trend to say the least. One of them was because he’s on the coaching testimonial page, and another through Instagram or some shit (he gave her his, she saw me on his following list, she clicked…BAM. My Instagram is strictly blog/brand/business related, don’t have a personal one).

And of course, there’s a link to my site in my Instagram bio.

But it seems girls don’t have better things to do with their time.

What’s the lesson in this? Even if you do your due diligence to protect yourself from girls finding your social media, shit still happens.


I’m angry because this girl has met my girl, whom I happen to really like. And despite her protests that it’s not her business and won’t tell my girl, I don’t believe her, at all.


Bro code, girl code. Both exist.

On top of that, they speak a language I can’t understand, so I’d never really know the truth about whether she’d keep it private or not.

I’d be none the wiser, and would think they were asking each other about their days, and in reality the conversation would be:

“Hey, I found your boyfriend’s blog, he said it took 18 hours to have sex with you the first time. Oh, he’s also a dating coach and a total whore. By the way, just Google ‘This Is Trouble’.

And the next day I’d be dealing with a torment of tears…

Now I’m faced with the situation that I can never let these two girls come face to face again.


Because I have no doubt it would absolutely devastate my girl – she’s young, innocent, and a bit (okay, a lot) naive of the world. She laid on my shoulder tonight and said she had a tough day, and all I wanted to do was hold her tight and keep her safe. Not expose her to my own demons.

I really hate wasting brain power, time, and energy on stupid shit like this.

Unnecessary waste.

I recognize I’m somewhat of a public figure, and have come to terms with the consequences. I never want to hurt anyone, especially a girl I’m dating and genuinely care for. I expect girls that *I* date to hunt me down to the end of the Earth, and so I take precautions to make sure that they can’t find this.

And if they do find it, it’s at a point in the relationship where they can probably handle it with some reassurances from me (example).

It seems I just expect too much of other people.

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  • If my girlfriend found my blog she would immediately stab me to death. Scares me more than herpes.

  • If R had a blog/twitter I didn’t know about I probably wouldn’t mind. Men need a space JUST for men. (As I comment on your blog for men… ironic) But I could never imagine having my blog private from Him, he has full access to my entire online presence.

  • Matt

    I like you a lot Kyle but you make your bed and you have to sleep in it. You can’t be mad if a girl finds out your secrets. I respect you (and McQueen) more than anyone else in the sphere because you post your pics of yourself and don’t hide behind a cartoon imagine like most sphere frauds. You own who you are. But that comes with consequences to women that find out. Wishing you the best in sorting this out. Lot of fish in the sea if not.

    – Matt

    • Matt, thanks much for the kind words and respect.

      Maybe I wasn’t clear enough: but she didn’t (and hasn’t) found the blog. And after she spent a week with me last week, I think we’re now at a point where she could see who I was, who I am now — and everything would be okay (but probably a few tears still).

      This article was more about my roommate’s girl finding me through him (which was stupid) and how I realized I was not equipped to deal with OUTSIDE sources giving it all away; especially early in a relationship.

      Thanks for the wishes! Everything is good for now.

      – Kyle

  • Bullitt315

    I’m pretty sure every woman in the world could be an amatuer P.I. if she wanted to be. They’re all nosy as hell.


    The girl I criticized in this post read it. Texted my roommate and was not very happy about it. Said she reads my blog “from time to time” and saw this post.

    Yet…it just went up yesterday. Seems she reads it more often than time to time!

    Basically proved the entire point of this article. And seriously–give me a break.

    If you take the time to stalk my blog, talk to me about it, and make my life more difficult–all is fair. Don’t cry when I write about it. And this article was pretty mild in nature.

    She could have kept it all to herself that she’d found it, never questioned me about it more in person, and all of this wouldn’t have happened.

    If you can’t take the heat, stay out of the fucking kitchen.

    • Brianmark

      Like I said, it’s easy to get caught. All it takes is a serious interests from the girls and too many girls.

  • Brianmark

    If you don’t get caught when living and dating in foreign country, then you’re not building enough attraction with these girls. I have been caught in two counties by girls. Here is why. They know where you live and you walk around the area near where you live. They will see you out with another girl if you spend a significant amount of time with your girls. You can’t build harems without this happening. Do you have a chapter about how to mitigate this in your Harem Handbook?

    • Yes, entire section dedicated to setting up your relationship where you’re allowed to do this.

      Getting “caught” isn’t being caught if you’re not breaking any rules.

      I added a lifetime guarantee to that product, so you should definitely check it out. Give me a shout if you have questions or anything!

  • Ash

    Never underestimate a woman’s ability to find things out.

  • wizardprang

    “A girl’s got to have her secrets”… but apparently if a guy has any, that’s a major deal-breaker.

  • Caitlin

    Stumbled across this and went through to read the stories of when other girls had found your blog as well. I can’t stress enough how important it is for guys to keep their cool when I’m irrationally emotional and/or angry. The times when guys allowed the drama to escalate are the times I immediately lost respect for them. Whereas the times when they kept their cool and made it seem like whatever I was upset over was minuscule, respect and attraction for them grew immensely.

    • Thanks for the comment–yes, it’s a major attraction-booster.

      One exception: when the girl is TRULY in the wrong, a stern hand does need to be enforced. Also an attraction-booster.

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