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Saw Her On the Street

I Saw Her On the Street. She Liked Me. The Bus Was More Important.

She passed me on the street, and I didn’t hesitate.

I turned around within five seconds and ran after her. Flowing dark brown hair, blue eyes, and a bit of a tired, boring attire that suggested she was on her way home from work.

Right as I caught her and pulled alongside, she started to run. The crosswalk ahead wouldn’t stay green for very much longer. Knowing it was now or never, I briefly quickened my stride and pulled out just ahead of her, while simultaneously lighting tapping her on the arm.

She stopped.

I opened my mouth and words came out.

“Hi. I saw you walk by me, and thought you were really cute. I just knew I’d regret it if I didn’t stop and meet you.”

Her eyes spazzed out slightly in shock as she took in the situation. Her reply:

“Wow, thank you”, with a big smile.

“But I’m so sorry, I have to catch this bus. Thank you so much!”

And just like that, she was gone with another skip in her step, rushing off to catch her bus. The bus that would take her from her 9-5 cubicle job that she probably despises, back to her flat wherever she lives. There, she’ll heat up a meal in a packaged box, plop down in front of the television, and sit there until it’s time to sleep.

Tomorrow, she’ll rise and do it all again.

I’m going to be honest here, and come right out to say that I’m not a pro daygamer. I briefly did a bit several years ago, but with my own 9-5 slave job, I just never got around to truly mastering it. With that being said, I’m not a total amateur. My overall game and conversation skills are top notch. I’d already made a few dozen daygame approaches in my life, even getting some numbers and bangs. So whilst I’m not a rookie, I’m also smart enough to know that I’m rusty, and not 100% calibrated. It’s going to take some practice to get good.

However, I’m also good enough with girls to know that this specific girl wasn’t creeped out by me. She was genuinely flattered. The way her eyes sparkled slightly suggested she had some interest. Therefore, the question automatically becomes…

Why didn’t she stop longer?

Think about it. She didn’t know who I was, but wasn’t totally freaked out by me. Who knows what I could be for her. What if I was her future husband the father to her children? What if I could provide in such a way she never had to return to the job she hated?

(Yes, I am making assumptions on that – but many people here have a very tired and downtrodden look at the end of the day. I can spot misery a mile away, because it wasn’t all that long ago that I was the miserable one walking home.)

What if I was her Disney fantasies come true?

We’re assuming a lot here, but in my mind this is what every girl’s fantasy is. To not meet a guy in a sleazy bar or club, but to instead be stopped and charmed by a confident man on the street.

You’d think that she’d be willing to spend 30 seconds with me to find all of the above out. To find out my potential, where I’m from, whether she could see herself going on a date with me. Whether she could brag to all of her friends about the guy who ran down the street to catch her because he couldn’t resist himself.

But no…

The bus was more important.

Was my game perfect – no, absolutely not. I was too hustled to catch her, and too hustled with my speech. It was not a perfect attempt. However, it was good enough. Good enough for her to stop and give herself that chance to meet me.

A shaken reality.

I’m not going to lie, this new reality has been tough for me to take in. But after having several similar encounters in the last couple of days (where the girls were clearly intrigued, not creeped out, but had to rush off to something), I’m feeling pretty comfortable with stating this: girls are simply not putting men as a priority.

For the record, they’re still far more receptive to men than in America – while out at night recently, a friend of mine remarked to me that he could tell that men and women here don’t hate each other like they often do in the West.

However, this new reality of mine was definitely a reality check for myself. I think the issue lies somewhere in the middle of culture and biology. Culture tells women that they have all the time in the world to find a man these days, so to think outside of that box would require them to turn off the hamster to admit it.

I’m left with no choice – get better.

It’s time to start.

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  • hoodlum81

    “girls are simply not putting men as a priority.”

    Not sure I’d 100% agree with this.

    Simply put, your apparent value was not sufficient in that moment to override her desire to get home. If you’d been dressed in a custom Armani suit, pulled alongside her in a Ferrari (exaggerating for effect here) – different story perhaps.

    It’s good to practise approach skills, but they’re no substitute for self-improvement, as I’m sure you know. You could spend years and years chasing women on the street, whilst improving your value by nothing (as a LOT of PUAs do) – or you can pursue it as a fleeting side-interest, whilst you invest 90% of the time into getting rich, and then several years down the line when you’re loaded, the whole thing just becomes easy mode, and you can access a whole new tier of women that won’t even look twice at you now, no matter how tight your game is.

    I know you know this, but I always like to vent on this subject.

    • Well, the Ferrari is in the shop…what am I supposed to do? 😉

      Yeah, I know you and I are on the same page with this. Self improvement is what got me to this point, not reading The Game and memorizing cheesy lines and routine. You know this as well as anyone once you got shredded.

      BUT…that actually kind of proves my point.

      I had nice clothes on (blazer/dress shoes). No custom Armani, but better dressed than 99% of people on that street.

      Why not at least STOP and give me thirty seconds? Again, what if I’m the “end game” for her? Isn’t it worth 30 seconds to find that out?

      • CrackerDaddy

        She may have actually had a bus she had to catch. To borrow from Dr. Freud, sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

      • Of course. It (life) happens.

        but my point still stands.

        The next bus is five minutes later.

        Isn’t it worth the risk to give me say…thirty seconds? Now she’ll never know.

      • Sack O’Truth

        Lucky girl.

      • Damn straight.

      • Aldi

        Why didn’t you get on that bus?
        Also ( a girl here) she was probably ina relationship already, and tried to politely brush you off. But I’m sure she enjoyed the attention:)

      • I don’t have time to waste on women who won’t give me 30 seconds. On to the next.

      • 123

        I just wonder why some men/women suffer for or want somebody who doesn’t care for them. But don’t appreciate people who really love them. Maybe it was your luck she didn’t stop. You don’t know anything about her but saw only nice face and body.
        Human nature is a strange thing.
        She could be married or something like this.

      • Of course I didn’t know anything about her. That’s what I wanted to find out.

      • 123

        Do you think there is sense to waste time and think about person you don’t know at all?

      • You wouldn’t understand. You’re a girl. You’ve never had to approach a man and put your balls and heart on the line.

        You live a life where things just come to you, from a romantic sense. Men have it better in other facets of life.

        So yes, as a girl who is PASSIVE and can do little to control the outcome — you should give every man at least a couple of seconds.

        Sure, she could have been married, but if she was she would have just said that.

      • 123

        Sure man usually makes first step but in relationship both have to make efforts. Men can’t build relationship genetically. If I am a woman it doesn’t mean my life is easier. It’s a man’s world.

        I work hard and have lot of responsibility. I just don’t see any sense to be upset because some girl didn’t want to talk to you . But this is my opinion. Not more.

        What about woman’s feelings when men lie in order to get sex, cheat, hurt? Should women hate all men? I am sure every single woman in this world had bad experience : cheating or lie. I am sure lot of men on this forum who write disgusting things about women they didn’t analyze their own actions. Nobody is saint.

        Just trust in best and move on.

      • We are not talking about ANY of those things.

        You are overreaching.

        We are talking about approaching the first time, which women never do.


  • horace template

    It’s a tough one. If you stop a woman to tell her she’s hot, I wonder if subconsciously thinks “I’m hot, I’m more valuable…and…what will I tell my friends how I met this guy? It’s too embarrassing to admit I got picked up at a bus stop” [sidebar – although finding the ‘one’ on Tinder is total legit…]

  • Aryanblindboy

    …if that’s her bus schedule to and from work then you know where to be and when to be there for another encounter – not saying to ‘stalk’ her – just saying, that bus stop, on that street, at that time of day is where you’ll probabaly find her again. You might turn up to ride the bus with her. “Hi – I’m the guy who thinks your amazingly, stunningly beautiful and I want to introduce myself. If you don’t mind, may I sit with you?” or something like that… she thanked you for the compliment the first time. I think she’ll appreciated a second time too.

    • I couldn’t do this. Not in a million years. Way too much of a lack of abundance mindset. That’s valuable time it would take me to go and try to time a meeting like that. Never worth it.

      The “may I sit next to you” line is really not me either. I never ask.

      I mean, I’m genuinely curious – have you tried something like this? Timing a second run in?

      • Aryanblindboy

        lack of abundance – valuable time – worth – I never ask – timing a second run in – go get what you want. get it how you want – whatever – your’s is as as good as the next – I got mine – you got yours?

      • You didn’t answer the question.

    • hoodlum81

      Going up to a chick you just saw and telling her you thought she was cute is spontaneous.

      Staking her out, telling her you think she’s “amazingly, stunningly beautiful” has just crossed the line waaay over into extremely creepy.

      • It’s just also not a high value move.

        A high value man has far better things to do with his time.

      • CrackerDaddy

        EXACTLY! Don’t be THAT thirsty guy. 😉

      • Aryanblindboy

        not thirst – just going after it – once? twice? three times? go get it.

      • Going to that bus stop again definitely would fall into creepy.

      • Winner winner.

      • Aryanblindboy

        high value what? far better things than being with a beautiful woman – like what?

      • Than wait at a bus stop to find a girl who already made it clear that meeting him wasn’t a priority?

        I can think of a few things.

        Other girls.

      • Aryanblindboy

        so be spontaneous again – doh.

  • the_spiral

    Her “eyes sparkled slightly”? She didn’t like you. If she liked you she would’ve stopped and caught the next bus. She was just buzzing off the attention. And you have no idea what life she’s going home to because you don’t know her.

    • Did I not write multiple times that I “assumed” a few things?

      • the_spiral

        It’s all good, I just wouldn’t take it personally or project such expectations on strangers. It only leads to disappointment. She could be married, in a relationship, late for a second job or class, rushing home to care for a sick relative etc. All you know is that she seemed to enjoy the positive attention but didn’t have time to stop.

      • Oh, no offense taken (from her or you) – I realize now my initial response may have sounded a bit bitter there.

        Yes, there are a million factors that go into it – all of the above could be true.

        Ultimately it’s just on to the next!

        Great critical comment though, much appreciated.

      • the_spiral

        Thanks – I usually don’t comment (critically or not) unless the article made me think. Great blog!

      • Thank you much!

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  • babydriver

    The girl in the pic above is a doll.
    If not for the banner I would have copied the pic.

  • 123

    Maybe she is married or has a bf. If i talked to any man who wants to talk to me on the streets or restaurants i would not have time for myself and my life.

    • lol, and how many times has this happened to you in your life?

      • 123

        What exactly?

      • You’ve been approached by a man in the street.

      • 123

        I don’t count. It happens from time to time.

      • “If I talked to EVERY man who wanted to talk to me on the street I would not have time for my life”

        “It happens from TIME TO TIME.”

        Strong logic there dear.

      • 123

        Nothing is wrong with logic. Should i count?
        More than that mostly in the street who try to talk are foreigners. I don’t talk to foreigners in the street. Only if they ask how to find some place.
        EE men usually don’t try to pick up women in the steet. They can say smth nice, compliment but withount any intention. Or they can help if woman needs a help etc…

      • EE has a social circle where men can find girls very easily.

        Unfortunately those social circles are not accessible to us foreigners unless we spend a lot of time in a city.

      • 123

        For our men is not easy to meet a woman too.

      • It’s nothing like the US.

        I regularly see ugly dudes with beautiful girls. Things are different.

      • 123

        Where do you see ugly dudes with beautiful girls?

        It means these dudes have money ))) not all beautiful girls have brain.

      • Everywhere in Ukraine there are stunning girls with guys who look like they had their face caved in with a shovel.

      • 123

        Yes and no. I don’t know which cities of Ukraine you visit. There are beautiful women and handsome men. I agree that are more nice women. Our women don’t care too much if man is beautiful or not)) we choose men for family for their deeds. But anyway in my environment men and women are nice and stylish what I can’t say about American people in general. Plus lot of fat people. American men are too far from being stylish, either women – in general.

      • So you’re Ukrainian?

        I’ve been to kiev and Odessa

      • 123


      • Where are you from?

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